What really makes me feel a human are my deeds that combine every human aspect in me. My bad and good deeds. Sometimes I’m a saint, sometimes I’m a sinner. Sometimes I’m an animal, sometimes I’m a human. Sometimes I’m mad, sometimes I’m calm. Sometimes I’m crazy, sometimes I’m rational. Sometimes I’m hard, sometimes I’m soft. Sometimes I’m heartless, sometimes I’m compassionate.
Is it normal to have all these contradictions and paradoxes? Are other humans the same? Are humans either good or bad; saints or devils? Can you honestly tell yourself that you have never felt any negative feeling towards anyone? That you have never lied in any kind of situation? That you have never talked about anyone behind her/his back? That you have never…..etc. Which side you believe is dominate the good or the bad?
Before you answer think: Have I passed through all kinds of tests to realize the person I’m; what I’m capable of. Whenever I do a bad thing, do I justify what I did saying “The situation was very tough, it drove me to do a thing that I wouldn’t do in normal situations”. But what is a normal situation, is it to live in peace, with no tests to go through?! Of course this is the abnormal. Think of times and conditions when people made mistakes, be objective, don’t take the role of a judge. Think if you got in their shoes, what will be your reaction? Will you be the good person you convince yourself you are?
What’s rolling in my head these days is that: As humans, we all know we make mistakes, we actually have to. Do I look back and consider my mistakes? Even if I do, do I find excuses for my sins and mistakes? Do I convince myself I had no other choice? OR Do I give away my claim that I’m a saint and be convinced I made a mistake that I must not do again? (Even saints make mistakes, after all they are humans) Do I repent? Even after repenting, do I really prevent myself from repeating the same mistake? Do I complain to Allah my weakness? Ask for forgiveness and help to reform myself?
If I’m a human who makes mistakes
I should be a human who knows I made mistakes
I should be a human who asks my creator to wash away all my sins
I should be a human who aims at overcoming my natural weakness
As a human being
Humans are so complex.....we are all what you have described and more.....I am not sure if there is a perfect definition of what is being a human......we can love/hate the same person, we can cry/laugh at the same time....so many oxymoron's....to many to write. This is a deep thought provoking post my friend....:-) Hugs
ReplyDelete